We need to instil the values of respect and consent in our children as two of the most significant values.
Daron has a soap box moment. (Warning this soapbox is explicit and disturbing)
What's happening to our girls? Whats happening to our boys? Whats happening to our society? Where has the village gone?
These questions rattled through my head the other night when my daughter told me that friends of hers had been caught up as victims in a perverse pornography ring. What could only be described as predatory/mob behaviour was occurring and girls were victimised/objectified as criminal acts occurred with their naked photos being posted online. Many of the victims are under the age of consent! Some of the images were doctored as well.
Users of the site post the names of potential victims they want images of, encouraging other forum patrons to "hunt" them down, entice them into taking nude photos of themselves for the guy either by herself or engaged in a sexual act and the guy will then upload the images to the site. Girls who spoke up against the group were then themselves targeted.
More than 2000 graphic images of underage girls has been posted on a site from 70 schools across Australia both private and public. Predatory behaviour from young men allowed them to access photos of class mates, girls in their school or girls in their neighbourhood. Many of these photos were posted by ex boyfriends in what is known as "revenge porn". Many young girls have been made victims and have been embarrassed by this abhorrent behaviour.
What is happening in our society at the moment is really ugly. In current society our women and girls are objectified. Our sexual norms and behaviours have gone out the window in a society full of soft porn and hard core graphic porn is only a few clicks away.
The problem is that the porn has always been around but in years gone buy it was softer and a lot harder to access. Boys have always been curious but a furtive look on the newsagent or a magazine under the bed now seems innocent compared to what is happening today.
Today graphic porn is only 3 clicks away and is in the bedroom of our children and most have accessed porn by the time they reach their teen years.
The type of porn they access is utterly degrading, horrific, violent and objectifies and pornifies woman. Boys and girls are now taking their cues for what they see as "normal" sex from the porn they see.
The types of games they play online degrades women and makes raunch culture normal.
The type of songs they listen to degrades women.
Often the marriages and relationships they witness degrades women.
The billboards, advertising and shop fronts they see tells them a story that it is ok to objectify, degrade and use vulgar jibes language and violence against women.
The raunch culture is wreaking havoc on relationships and the fallout is catastrophic. The porn they see is often violent and degrading with little empathy for women. It often presents men as being in positions of power that distorts teenagers developing thoughts on sex.
Porn also has an effect on the developing brain much like an addiction. Boys/men who 'get off" on violent sex find it really hard to have a normal relationship with their partners affecting marriage and relationships.
The old days of hand holding and the first date, first kiss has now been replaced by boys demanding graphic/lewd acts on the first date and girls are feeling pressured to "give out", take photos of themselves nude etc if they want to be accepted as normal and also for the relationship to continue.
This is leaving girls traumatised and abused and leaving boys bewildered as to what is the right thing to do. The nude photos taken innocently in a relationship ends up online and after that is forever hard to erase.
This is not just happening out there... It is happening in your school, your church, your home. Trust me, I am hearing the stories and they are not pretty... Our "Christian" bubble is no longer safe!
It is time to take back the village.
It is time for us as parents to have those somewhat hard chats with our sons and daughters about sex, sexting, pornography and criminal behaviour. These conversations need to be regular and ongoing.
We need to instil the values of respect and consent in our children as two of the most significant values... These values are taught best when modelled by their parents (particularly Dads) and significant others.
It is time for Dads to stand up and be the Dads and show children the right way to treat a woman. This is where it begins for our sons and daughters
It is time for woman to chat with their daughters about their bodies, relationships and that no means no and that if they feel uncomfortable doing something then the answer is always no! Our children need to realise the dangers of any sort of nude photo being sent electronically whether in an intimate relationship or not!
It is time for the village to rise up and say to society enough is enough. Corporate pedophilia is messing up our boys and girls, our marriages and relationship and we want to draw a line in the sand.
We need to shame companies that use sex to sell and who market to our children a story that is just not true.
Our girls and our woman are not a commodity to be consumed, degraded and considered as lesser beings.
We need to advocate for victims and mentor those who have fallen by the wayside in our pornified culture.
The change starts with you and me. Its starts with your children and mine.
It starts with correct and consistent parenting. Its harder than ever before but we need to address the hard questions and be guardians of our homes and villages.
It starts with your marriage/relationship and mine. It starts with your community, your village, your world.
Daron gets off his soapbox and begins to take back his village!